A vulnerable angel – 1968
What is love?
We are supplied with a super-abundance of beautiful wise words written or said by other people, and we tend to put them on the wall or make altars out of them. Master R told Anne Davies, “Love and you shall know”. We need to discover our words from the heart, as they speak themselves.
He said further, “A loved creature, like the Frater’s dog, or like the little bird, has compared to yours, a short incarnation span. You don’t really shorten that span by loving an animal, but you do plant in that creature something far beyond the usual enfoldment. Death comes to all bodies, and the death of wild creatures is seldom as quick and merciful as that of these two.
“Yet death is but a door. Nothing dies but bodies. The essential being lives on, and whatever has received unselfish, loving care, has been given a tremendous impulse forward, so the power of that love makes possible a very rapid advance in the scale of unfoldment. Not because you loved them did they die, but because you did love them are they farther along the path than they would be, but for that love.
“Never fear to love. Never stint the outflow of that divine power. What grief and pain seem to be associated with love come always from attachment. Love seeks not its own, because love never feels itself to be separated from its own.”
Anne asked, “What if love is not returned?”
“No, Soror. Love seeks no return, because love knows there is always a return. Outer manifestation of response is not necessary for love. Loving is giving, and love feeds itself in giving. It is we with our short sight, who fail to know what love knows always, that nothing can separate anyone or anything from love. The whole world came into being by love, is maintained by love, and continues by love.
“But apart from philosophy, your little bird sings more happily than here, and your dog is closer to you this minute than ever he was while in the body. This we assure you most definitely, and if we are false in this, then is all the rest of our teaching worse than nonsense, for the whole mystery of the universe is the secret of love,
and the triumph of love over death is the supreme victory.”
I was deeply touched with this passage when I first read it, about ten years ago. It affirmed that whatever I might think or doubt about channeled Masters, here is the Wisdom itself – pure gold.
Turning inward, discovers the inner Teacher, and this is the relationship without which there is no love. It takes practice.
Love is here and now in expression: the connection to gravity – but one needs to be co-creative with it, even when just sitting still. There needs to be some Mars mixed with the Venus, to see and be the violet ray.
Always flowing with the unbroken connection with the One? This is misleading. Of course it happens when I write, because the words come up from that deposit in the subconscious, which is laid down since early childhood in this lifetime, and in invisible lifetimes preceding. It is the threads in the tapestry. Very rarely does a human being manifest it all the time. They do exist but they are few. The rest of the day – when it seemed so simple just to stay here – is consumed in the usual nags and frets of the dreamer.
Each time, that place is woken, with a fresh insight. Yet it is an unbroken thread. Come to it afresh, each time with the ongoing problem and pain in daily life – ask. The dialogue, corresponding with my own subconscious, awakens love. Love is a universal quantum, like gravity: a sense of passionate well being and peace, like a well or a mountain spring. It isn’t attached to a person, but is easily made to – at the drop of a hat. Then we start projecting! – that is the convention, in great literature and at the movies. All the great romantic love affairs in history have unhappy endings, because they drove themselves into that end-game. The human collective soul grows to expect this, and to draw nourishment and entertainment from it.
However, Love loves individual human beings in a myriad ways.
John the Organist – in Liverpool, 1968
Love cannot be confined. It is a limitless reservoir from which we drink: no cup can contain it – (that is the illusion we mostly live by). But the cup is emptied and is dipped again. This is according to our own bio-rhythms which sleep and wake in a linear sequence, like waves.
Fact is – there are samskaras and types of Karma embedded in the embodied soul. They all need active expression, to become conscious, transformed and therefore released, and none of it happens overnight. What we get is a kind of fabric – the stuff we have to weave in life, like earning a living; the state of the human-world; or being a parent or partner. The worries and tensions are interwoven with the bright thread which is love-eternal – the star-born. The secret is in detecting the thread, and bathing in it, for a moment at a time; finding what activity sustains or allows it NOW. My way is writing or studying. Your way might be Yoga or studying, or ritual, or parenting.
Constant attention to the Divine is not a practical proposition in life – unless one is a monk It initially inspires, but puts pressure on the student, and further distances him/her from WHAT IS. When we are inspired, it is at that focused moment ALL THERE IS; and it lives for ever. There is no clue in that moment (Key 11), of the small and huge frustrations and fatigues of daily life which cloud it over as the day goes on. The adepts had just as much trouble as you and me, whenever they were not actually transmitting.
It is hard for me to notice the cosmic Love, when I am right in it, in the strange shapes it presents, here and now, which are not as expected.
It is hard to trust life just as it is; but to trust it, is the key.
Sky angels over St Malo – 1986
Paul Foster Case had quite a troubled personal life – I gather, from biographical snippets online – and must have drawn enormous solace from the huge task he was given to do – to write all the books and hundreds of Lessons, to build the School of the Adytum. The Great Work must have kept him happy and on even keel. He was the vessel; and captaining the vessel was the Magid or Master R. When it all began, Paul got so attenuated with the rush of kundalini-shakti, that he was ordered by the Master to ground himself by drinking wine and eating red meat for a year – so I have been told.
Paul was a master organist – in his heart and soul, as well as in his musical gift. Music takes practice – feet and hands, keyboard and pedals. So does Love. Babies learn to walk first, to run to their parents and be welcomed with joy. Every single one.
1978 her first steps, 13 months
The writing, speech and prayer, touches the Hermit’s peak, Key 9, which is eternal: but the bulk of our life is embodied in Key 18 which is the time it takes.
I saw many people go to neo-advaita Satsang and try to grab what they found there, and take it home. But they couldn’t. Why? Because they were trying to get it from someone else, sitting there and shining and making their heart buzz. It fades, like an after-image of the sun. Anyone who wants to, and is good at it, can sit and give Satsang and channel the accumulated focus of all those hopeful and receptive faces. It is a splendid feeling. Wisdom flows back.
A ROGUES GALLERY of Satsang teachers in London, 1 April 1999
I collaged these portraits together for April Fools Day – pages of an old journal.
Oh, Angel – 1988
John de Ruiter and Francis Lucille
Ramesh, Wayne, Mira & Ranjit Maharaj
Arunachala sivalinga, Bernardo Satyananda & Isaac Shapiro
Catherine Ingram and … ?
Douglas Harding’s 90th birthday – the late Alan Rowlands is to the right
But to attend to your organic inner language of the same, takes time, passion and commitment. It takes really valuing and savouring the earliest feelings in childhood, good and bad. Here, you are a pioneer. No one ever expressed them, but you. But when you say and discover them, you may go out, and a book will fall into your hand from a shelf somewhere, and show you that these unique feelings and flavours were and are all over the Ancient World and its ageless wisdom, as archetypes. ( That is how Kabbalah discovered me.) The Ancient World is here and now, like looking down into clear water.
Attend honestly to what feels Real for you – beyond speech, and before literacy. Touch it inside.
Then you will find, when you study the Tree of Life, or any spiritual path, that you have been there, heart and soul, and recognise it and the Lessons in principle, with your life and leaf, with the blood vessels and capillaries through your body. This is love – the holy greeting. The smallest response is That. It is the still small voice. It is NEVER the big billboard.
small angel, 1956
The distractions of 21st century human life – as in any century – are immense. Nobody expects you to be awake all day. No one is. It is fluid like the sea, and like a sky of storms and sunlight. If you are on the peak for long periods, it tends to stagnate and to form for itself a pedestal; then come all the problems of Key 15, which close up the open sky of Key 6 and put it into the boxes in Key 20, whence arise again the Delivered ones; your interior holy Family. Resurrection is salvage.
Holy Guardian Angel beckons with the trumpet note which is known uniquely and privately to your inner self. Find and hear it! (Keys 20 and 5.)
Visualisation – and keep it simple – instructs the flow of the blood and cells, as in the Lessons on the Hermit and Virgo. From that kindled vitality arise the pictures of the soul, with your breath: prana..
The great problem in spiritual work is Dryness. That is when we cannot quite form a living connection – relationship with what we are studying or praying. It is like going to an exhibition and just looking at pictures by someone else. Yet we know it is the soul’s own ground, and our true nature, else what are we doing with prayer? Intuitively, instinctively, it is known … “only connect.”. The sense of being separate, is the problem. And it comes from making many ardent possessions of thought, and capturing them for security: identifying with them at Hod. The entire business is transacted between Tifareth and Hod, Key 15: solve et coagula. Solve et coagula – again and again. Renewal. Mirth at my extravagant delusions.
We tend to be misers with our gold. One who keeps his gold in a box, cannot enjoy it. We all do this more or less, because life and the economy is scary and we are insecure. We were taught to, by our parents, and we teach it to our children. So the insecurity manifests, globally.
Alchemy. I have psychological scars from youth, in relationships. This ground was given me to work with for the rest of my life, like a patch of garden. It is often heavy, and I get depressed. Transforming pain, and the reactivity from it, to something creative which forgives it – because the creative something is part and parcel of that trauma’s quintessence – is my job, the job which Upstairs gave me to fulfil. I am certain I perceived and accepted the whole thing before I was born. Then it had to do its time – the meeting, the falling in love, the psychological abuse, which triggered dormant dragons in deep past Karma which needed to be exorcised and delivered to the Light. It was and is long, slow and thorough. I find it really difficult to be straightforward and honest with someone, when the words don’t come.
So I value the terrible times, because of what underlay them, like gold in the dark mine, and erupted through them; because of what they really are. Gold! Philosophers’ gold, ultimately. There is no real discovery in the spiritual life, without the earth bound stress of realisation … digging out the gold by whatever way is given. Jesus said Use your Talent. You know what it is.
The flowers in spring push up gently through the resistant membrane of the ground.
The gold in the rocks and minerals of earth, is congealed Sunlight. The same flows in our veins, as red and white corpuscles. It breathes us in and out. We breathe. JHVH.
When a certain depth is touched, there is no one who can heal it but myself; so I was unable to work with therapists. (Each time I tried, it was a fiasco!) I turned to my creative gifts instead, which were put here, for this reason; to investigate their source, language, and transmute the darkness into light. It still goes on. To begin with, it was extravagant and on a chattering high. Over the decades, it sobered up and became more rounded.
I am close to two persons who survived hell. Living with their courage, and with their tiny organic changes which spread eventually far and wide, is Alchemy. Today I grieve. There is much pain in my life at the moment. But I think it teaches me about myself, where I come from.
THE KEY TO IT ALL IS CONCENTRATION … on the living Thread, like doing a carving or writing a poem. Focus. Focus is love.
Many seekers are babies being weaned off formula.
I listened to Oscar Wilde talking through a medium – this was on Elene’s blog. He began with petulant impatience on how dim most people are, and ended with a drift of spiritual platitudes which sent me to sleep – I was very tired. But it is entertaining, humane and interesting. He was reluctant at first, to divulge his name. He said it had got him in a lot of trouble. It is very difficult for a soul on the inner planes, to get through our linear fog screen.
The one on the right is a much better drawing. I am always surprised by what happens when I turn the photo upside down and draw from that. The volume and modelling are better. It is something to do with seeing just what’s there, without short cuts, or habits; attention.
Link to “What is Thought?” in my other blog
Aquariel – an angel of the waters and of the air through the woods of life.
COPYRIGHT – All art and creative writing in this blog is copyright © Janeadamsart 2012-2013. May not be used for commercial purposes. May be used and shared for non-commercial means with credit to Jane Adams and a link to the web address http://janeaquariel.wordpress.com/